### Parable of the Cross One day, a man turned to God with a request: — Lord, my cross is too heavy. I can no longer bear it. Allow me to choose another. And suddenly he found himself in a huge cave, where there were all sorts of crosses — stone, iron, spiked, huge and unmanageable. — Choose, — said the Lord. The man walked around the cave for a long time and finally noticed a small wooden cross in the corner. — This one! It is the lightest. God smiled: — But this is your cross. ### Why We Think Others Have It Easier According to clinical psychologist Yulia Koroleva, the meaning of this parable is not a call to endure any difficulties, but rather that a person almost always compares their life with others, seeing only the beautiful external picture. From the perspective of cognitive behavioral therapy, several typical thinking errors are at play here. ### We Do Not Know What Happens in Other People's Lives One of the most common cognitive distortions is the so-called "mind reading." We think we understand perfectly how another person lives, how happy they are, and how easy their life is. In reality, we see only a small part of their life and involuntarily fill in the rest with our own fantasies. Other people's experiences, problems, and fears often remain hidden. ### When Expectations Make Us Unhappier Another trap of thinking is the belief that life must necessarily be easy and fair. When reality does not match expectations, anxiety, irritation, and a sense of injustice arise. The psychologist reminds us: difficulties are a natural part of every person's life, and it is impossible to completely avoid them. ### "Others Have It Better" Is Not Always True Often, a person begins to think in terms of "all or nothing." Thoughts like: * "Everything is bad for me." * "Others are doing great." * "My cross is the heaviest." In reality, everyone has their own difficulties; they are just not always visible to others. ### Why We Want to "Change Our Cross" When a person experiences chronic stress, fatigue, or emotional burnout, they start to feel that they can no longer cope. In such moments, the brain seeks a simple explanation for what is happening and pushes for comparisons with other people. But such comparisons only intensify the feeling of helplessness and dissatisfaction with one’s life. ### What Psychologists Recommend Experts advise separating facts from personal assumptions. If the thought arises: "Everything is easy for him," it is helpful to stop and remind yourself: **"In reality, I do not know what this person is going through."** The "pros and cons" technique can also be useful: try to find real evidence for your thought. Most often, it turns out that they are based only on guesses. Equally important is to redirect attention to your own life and ask yourself: **"What can I do today to make it a little easier?"** If the feeling of overload does not pass, do not stay alone with it. Support from loved ones, friends, or a psychologist helps to cope with life's difficulties much more effectively. The parable of the cross reminds us of a simple but important truth: other people's lives almost always seem easier simply because we do not see their reverse side. Instead of comparing ourselves to others, it is more beneficial to focus on our own possibilities, take care of ourselves, and remember that even the heaviest burden becomes lighter when there is support and time for rest.